New day. New blog. New beginning.
After months of deliberation, I made the move. Packing my words into a small cardboard box and making the trip to another domain. To a place that feels somehow more like “home”. With a shiny new blog, I am hoping to gather my writing momentum again. It’s been lacking of late and has perhaps packed itself into a box and moved house as well.
I finished the Year of the Edit with Kim Wilkins. It was such a valuable experience. Kim is an amazing teacher and there was never a dull moment. I was one of the first up for critique. I think that’s when my writing momentum shrivelled and died. The feedback was accurate and necessary. The first ten pages of the story I submitted, I have since realised, is not the story I want to tell. I spent the months during the course pondering. What is my story? Where did it go? I feel I know it inside and out but how do I get that sensation down on the page?
As the course progressed, I listened and learned, took notes but felt like I didn’t have a “real” story anymore. I had nothing to apply all the great knowledge to. I felt like a fraud at times. My own work stalled in the process as others sped down the track leaving me in their dust. I changed gears for a while. Gently pushed my WIP aside to dabble with a couple of short stories. Something to take away the feeling of failure I seemed to have taken on board. But each word I wrote for “another story”, felt like I was cheating my one true love; the story that feels a part of me, the story that seemingly won’t rest until it has been birthed to the world.
So I have all this editing knowledge. I know the pitfalls to avoid, ways to freshen my manuscript, how to straighten out story line kinks and fill in gaping black plot holes. What I don’t have anymore is a manuscript that portrays the true story I want to tell. And that makes me miserable. How do I fix this? I start again. But not on my own.
On the first day of August, I will begin Year of the Novel online with Kim Wilkins. It is strange to first do an editing course on a manuscript you thought was heading in the direction you wanted to go. But alas, why do things by the book? I’m doing it this way for my book. I am doing it because I believe in my story and I want to tell that story as well as I can. And with Kim’s guidance, I know I can do this.
I’m taking a page from author Julia Green’s book.
‘Practise lots. It can take a long time to get a story right. Don’t rush it. Let it take the time it needs. Do lots of re-writing. Talk to other people who write. Believe in your story.’
So here’s to my first post on a new blog, with a new plan. I’m off in search of my happily ever after. Even if I have to write it myself.